Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

What are the best ways to treat seasonal allergies?

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I can read

Review | In its third season, ‘The Gilded Age’ is as staid and sudsy as ever - The Washington Post

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

T.J. Oshie, the Caps’ beloved ‘warrior,’ announces his NHL retirement - The Washington Post

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

What is the best SPF 60 Sunscreen for oily skin?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

Is it true that most people in Québec are bilingual in French and English? If so, why do they often identify as monolingual?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Humpback Whale Bubble Rings May Be an Attempt to Communicate With Us - ScienceAlert

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

What is the word for truth and its meaning in Koine Greek?

I understand how hurricane paths work

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t buy bullshit

What does it mean when someone says "I'm feeling frisky"?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I have complete contempt for fakery

At Chicago baseball stadium, Pope Leo makes his first pitch to America - The Washington Post

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

What are some alternative ways to express gratitude or acknowledge thanks in English or French without using the phrases "thank you" or "you're welcome"?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I have a reading level above third grade

Elena and the Season 3 balance patch for Street Fighter 6 are technically releasing a day early due to time zone differences - EventHubs

I see through liars

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

Is it a viable option to open an international Business Process outsourcing (BPO) company in India, considering the already existing abundance of such companies in the country?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I can count

Federal judge clears way for NYC broker fee ban to begin - Gothamist

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I actually pay taxes

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity